Wher Wher

I've been writing a blog entry for 20 minutes and just deleted it because I was getting bored writing it. If I'm bored writing it, you're definitely bored reading it.

My crazy cool cousin from Rockwall texted me a Happy Birthday tonight. My birthday is August 27th. Goober.

I learned today that I do not have a future in operating teleprompters. That is one future career option I can cross off my list. I guess I don't have a knack for them....at all. It made my interaction with a particular VIP ulta-awkward, and I did NOT leave a great first impression on him. I think that was mutual. He was clearly too busy to carry on a conversation with an intern.
If (and when) I make it to the top, somebody remind me to be kind and engaging to those who sit at the bottom of the ladder! 

I dyed my hair black 6 weeks ago with one of those "washes out in 28 washes" kind of things. Most of my hair has lightened up...but not to the original color (my grandfather noticed last night that it was darker...he normally wouldn't notice something like that). The front part of my hair is still pretty black. You can tell I did a fabulous dye job in the first place! I had parts that were lighter than the rest to begin with, but hair is hair and I don't really care (pardon my rhyme). I'm going to dye it again, with another 28 wash box, but not black this time. I loved the black, but my dad called me goth! haha. This time I'm going for "Natural Dark Brown". Then I'll let it wash out and go normal again. Maybe? We'll see.

I'm sorry I have a lack of thrilling stories to share. My life is just bursting with juicy excitement. One day...soon...I'll have a killer story to share, but for now, I'll let the suspense loom.

JAM SESSION

Check it.... go to pinkberry.com for a totally rad jam session. My gurl Hannah and I just had a Skype dance party. Couldn't figure out how to take screen shots, but they would have made your night. haha She's still singing it. I hear pinkberry has awesome ice cream too, but I only know about their site song from first hand experience.

Hannah gave me a shout out in her blog today, so I'm shoutin' back. I had a hilarious conversation with her yesterday (she just moved up to Louisville and I've talked to her on an average of 2 hours every night since Sunday...yeah, that's a lot). So, I was telling her about how we have this review thing to do at work. At the beginning of the summer they asked us our weaknesses (so I think in the review we have to talk about how the projects we worked on helped us grow). Anyway, I was joking with one of the fellows and said "I need to find a really good weakness! I mean, don't they know you're not going to give one of your REAL weaknesses? You have to make your weaknesses sound like a strength!" So fellow friend said "Yeah, like I'm going to say 'Sometimes I like to steal'?" And I was like "'Sometimes I'm really lazy'" Ha...who says that? Anyway.... Hannah came up with my perfect weakness.....ready for this? All of you who know me will think this is hilarious:

"When I first started working here, my weakness was MEN, but after working around all these guys all the time, I'm doing much better."

BAHAHAHAHA. This is why I keep Hannah around. She kills me!

I owe Dallas an apology.

Growing up in Fort Worth, it was only natural to hate on Dallas. Dallas is snooty, high-class, fast-paced, and always has the worst traffic. Fort Worth has more of a suburban feel, it's family-oriented, and people actually know how to drive. I hate when people try to mesh Dallas and Fort Worth together. Yes, we share an airport, but it isn't in Dallas OR Fort Worth. It annoys me when people from out of state have never heard of Fort Worth and I have to say, "It's right by Dallas." Who are these people that have NEVER heard of Ft. Worth!? I had one friend who was convinced I was from Dallas, despite my persistent protests. They're 2 different cities! 


I've come to realize that Dallas isn't as awful as I grew up thinking. Don't tell Fort Worth, but I actually kinda love Dallas. I especially love the Dallas North Tollway that runs straight through town. It feels wrong to go driving through town at 70mph, but you're on a tollway! It makes getting into town so fast, so I don't even feel like I live way north of town. It's probably really weird of me to love a tollway.


I went to the Dallas Farmers Market (DFM) this morning. Yes, I realize it is Sunday morning, but I've decided to go to church on Sunday nights, when mega-churches are much less intimidating. I went to the evening service last week, was a few minutes late, and STILL was able to find a seat on the lower level! Anyway, I went to the market, which is on the south side of downtown. Driving in, downtown looked deserted (of course, it was Sunday morning...) and suddenly I was second guessing this whole market idea. There were a lot more people at the DFM than I thought, lots of families. There were tons of farmers selling produce hustling me to try some watermelon, pineapple, mango, oranges...you name it! I got some grapes, bananas, and, of course, mangoes! The mangoes were more expensive than in the grocery store, but they were bigger, more ripe, and hey, I was supporting my local farmers! I can never pass up a good mango! (I even got some mango gelato made with organic milk and eggs before I left! It wasn't as good as Della Palma in Rome, but it was pretty good). I would've gotten some more veggies, but I still have my green beans from Austin and I was getting really tired of the hustling. I wonder if you can barter? That would make it so much more fun! I feel so awkward when people are trying to get me to buy stuff from them but I don't need a WHOLE barrel of strawberries! I definitely need to take a friend with me next time! 


Oh, I bought this roasted garlic linguine from the cutest old man! I met a really nice bread lady who said in a couple of weeks they're going to get a permanent booth at the market and they'll have all kinds of bread, and they'll have their slicer so they can cut it for you! (Yes....I do realize that getting excited over freshly sliced bread DOES make me a major nerd!) 


I'm still intimidated by the whole market experience, so I'm taking a friend with me next week! Let me know if you want to come!!!!!

My newest guilty pleasure...

I've never been a big fan of Cheez-its. They kind of go in the same category as Twizzlers....I just don't like them, except when that one kid brings a bulk of them to camp and its the only thing to eat in the cabin at 10pm when you're starving after that flag football tournament.

BUT I discovered the Cheez-its to DIE for! Well...maybe not, but I actually like them and I down a box like no body's business (no, really, don't ask. It's not your business). The DUOZ Cheez-its with Parmesan and Sharp Cheddar in the same box! KILLER! Try them! (And someone go tell Cheez-its to send me a check for giving them a MAJOR plug to my audience of....5? haha).

I finally did it! I registered for my rowing classes! Two weeks in September I'm taking rowing classes on Tuesday and Thursday nights! I'm pumped! I missed the July registration date, and I'm busy one of the weekends they're having the lessons in August, so September it is! It will be perfect rowing weather (I hope. I honestly don't know what perfect rowing weather is, but I'm going to love it!). I also just got a membership at 24 Hour Fitness (wow, I'm doing quite a lot of name dropping today), so I get start swimming again! I haven't been able to run since April because my stupid knee is busted with tendonitis. It sticks....bad. But luckily I love to swim and it won't bother my knee! Again, I'm pumped because I get to swim off all those Cheez-its!! (P.S. Props to whoever decided to put that hyphen in "Cheez-its"....who wants a cheese ZIT!?)

I was made for sunny days.

My friend introduced me to a new Denton-based radio station (91.7 FM) that plays cool indie music. I heard this song this morning and fell in love with the Weepies.

I went to the market, the world was threatening rain. I was late to that station, swore I'd miss that train. And the streets filled with umbrellas and we all looked the same. But I'm the one whose waiting till the sun comes out again.

CHORUS: I say, I was made for sunny days. I may do it great, but I didn't stay. I was made for sunny days, and I was made for you.

Found the look you gave me, when we were first in bloom; when I thought that you might save me from the dark side of the moon. Instead we both went walking to the shadows and the plume, and we never did stop talking; you still light up the moon.

Ooo ooo-oo-oo the nights are longer. Ooo ooo-oo-oo you make me stronger. And the late light lingers on the grass. And the nights are dark but then they pass. They don't seem so deep. I'm still losing sleep, but I don't mind, no, I don't mind.

I got you a winter jacket that I really wears around, and we chase him through the spring time when the sleeves drag on the ground. And every hour we're working, and work and play abound. And every day is Sunday 'cause the sun, comes dancing down.

Love it! I found this song too, but it's slightly more depressing....or empowering, whichever way you want to look at it. It's "You Can't Go Back Now":
Yesterday, when you were young/ Everything you needed done was done for you/ Now you do it on your own/ But you find you're all alone/ What can you do?

You and me walk on/ Cause you can't go back now.

You know there will be days when you're so tired that you can't take another step/ The night will have no stars and you'll think you've gone as far as you will ever get

But you and me walk on/ Cause you can't go back now/ And yeah, yeah, go where you want to go/ Be what you want to be,/ If you ever turn around, you'll see me.

I can't really say why everybody wishes they were somewhere else/ But in the end, the only steps that matter are the ones you take all by yourself

And you and me walk on/ Yeah you and me walk on/ Cause you can't go back now/ Walk on, walk on, walk on/ You can't go back now
__________________________________________________


I don't mean to get all weird or anything, but life after college is still surreal. I grew up at a church that sits right on TCU's campus, so I grew up (literally from birth to high school) passing through this college campus week after week. I always thought college kids looked so old. In high school, I thought all the college boys were so cute, and I thought the college kids who worked with the youth group were so cool and I couldn't wait to be like them and be independent...yada yada yada. So, the weekend before last, I went to a wedding at the church I grew up in, and passed through the campus like I did all those other weeks growing up. We passed a sign for freshmen orientation and it hit me.... I did that. I've been there, I'm done with that, I'm older than these people I grew up thinking were so old. (My DEEPEST apologies if you actually ARE old and I'm making you feel older).


I'll go ahead and blame the media because they're the easiest to blame. They makes kids think high school is the bomb dot com (it's not). Then college is seen as "the best days of your life" (and they were pretty awesome), but I'm not buying into the idea that at 21 this is it. 


I hate that all the graduation paraphernalia says stuff like "You did it! Bravo! You're done!" I didn't do anything (other than get a degree, which, granted, is kind of a big deal.) I just feel like now that I've spent a short amount of time in the workforce, I've seen how far I can go in the future, and my "accomplishments" pale in comparison to what I hope to accomplish one day. I'll try desperately not to turn this next idea into a college paper, but that's why I see the song "You Can't Go Back Now" as both REALLY depressing and really empowering. College was great. I feel like in my fourth year, I grew out of it (I don't know if I grew out of Samford or just the college experience in general, but I was ready to move on come graduation day). It would have been easy to stay in Birmingham and cruise through life at some job I halfway liked just because I was comfortable in Birmingham, but I honestly think leaving was the best thing I could do for myself at that time. I'm going back this weekend, just passing through really, for a wedding, but it is true I can't go back. It's not the same.


"In the end the only steps that really matter are the ones you take all by yourself." I was really nervous on graduation day about moving to Dallas and starting over. While my family and high school friends are about an hour away, I'm still really proud of myself for moving out here "alone." I like being independent and it took interrupting my comfortable life in Birmingham to remind myself what I'm capable of doing. I tweeted back in May "Sometimes familiarity and comfort need to be challenged," and I really think that's where we grow the most.


I'm sorry I got all deep and personal. I think I needed this pep talk more for myself than anything, so I could care less if it gets read. To sum it up, I'm happy. I'm in a good place, and I'm really optimistic. It's all about keeping a positive perspective! 

The 2 main reasons I've love my A.P.T so far...

1. I can't hear any annoying and repetitive rap music coming through the walls.

2. It has (to this point at least) been roach free! Really, it's been insect free completely, except for the one microscopic spider I found in the sink that died while I washed my hands.

I'm hoping the insect situation won't change. Today, the exterminator came. I'm assuming this is just routine (and I thank my wonderful apartment complex for this!) because I haven't had any problems to complain about. But don't they spray bait that ATTRACTS the bugs?! I'm not really okay with that. I don't want my now insect-free apartment to be attracting unwanted insects. PLEASE tell me this won't happen before I see my first larger-than-life roach scurry across my kitchen floor! I don't have any shoes I hate enough to kill it with!


I found a great lake that everyone bikes around! I was going to go out there with my bike today after work, but its pouring down rain. There's a sailing clubhouse out on this lake and the boats were SO pretty yesterday when I went out there close to sunset. I want to learn how to sail. I looked into classes....that might be a nice birthday present (wink wink MOM). Ha, I saw they have classes out at Lake Ray Hubbard, maybe I can drag my Rockwall cousins into taking sailing lessons with me! My second option would be to join a rowing team! I always thought the Oxbridge rowers looked so cool. That also requires money, so it can wait a couple of months.

Life Lessons I'm Learning

I've probably shared this one with you already, but it is the most pertinent in my life right now.
1. When you don't know what you're doing, or where you're going, follow the crowd and you'll get there.
     Now, I realize this little rule fails on so many levels. Following the crowd is rarely a good idea. But following this little rule was my key to surviving my first experience at the mega-church I visited today. (I'm considering changing the name of blog to "Confessions of a Church Visitor.") I drove around the ENTIRE campus that sits right off the interstate, and cars were parked back to back for miles, filling all the parking lots in sight. I followed the other cars into a parking garage like a line of ants. I got out of my car and followed the crowd. My little rule was helping me out so far. I may have been alone on what was clearly "Bring Your Boyfriend to Church Sunday," but at least I looked like I knew where I was going.

This was until I was the last person to jump on the overly crowded elevator in the parking garage. I squeezed in next to a very attractive young man in a light blue button down, and resisted the urge to pick him to be the one I followed just so I could strike up a conversation during the "greeting" part of the service. Anyway....I'm off track. The elevator doors opened, and suddenly I'm the first one off. I'm no longer following anyone. I'm leading. YIKES! I don't know where I'm going! I follow cute boy out of the corner of my eye and slow my pace so other people can lead.

I followed everyone (and their boyfriend) into the building, and up to the balcony. Now, I thought the Church of Brook Hills was a big church, but it looks small compared to this one. Maybe Brook Hills just mastered the large parking lot and spacious Sanctuary to accomodate the billions of people that go there. This church clearly had a parking issue, and the Sanctuary was PACKED out, completely. There was another girl (Tina, as I later found out) in front of me who was by herself (she didn't get the 'bring your boyfriend' memo either) and the usher pointed us to a few seats the 2nd row from the top (in the nose bleed section).

This is a good point to interject my 2nd life lesson:

2. Making friends in the "real world" is quite different than making friends in the sandbox in Pre-School. 
Long gone are the days when you could find your best friend while sharing Play-Doh and Link N Logs. Yes, the key to making friends in a large city may be going to the biggest church around, because statistically wise, that's where I'll most likely find people my age who want to be my friend too. BUT the girl with the Communication Studies degree has serious issues with walking up to a group of people and declaring I'm going to be their friend.

Samford made it easy to meet people w/ the freshmen-only camping trip before school started (SOSA) and this program during orientation called "Playfair". It is hard to explain Playfair if you've never participated, but it involves a lady in her 50s wearing spandex leading a group of kids to do weird and crazy things to help them meet each other. (sorry for the awful description, but it really is impossible to describe.) I can still tell you who my Playfair partner was: Rett Rivers. I had never met him before that and I don't think I ever talked to him after that, but I still remember him. We did the Playfair handshake.

People always meet their best friends in weird places. I remember 2 of my college friends met each other washing their hands in the bathroom. I have a feeling Preschool was the easiest place to make friends, high school was still pretty easy, college was a nerve-racking but I still made friends easily, but here, in the "real world" where I'm no longer solely surrounded by people my own age, it seems hard. I'm probably just a sissy and need to stop whining and just go join a book club.

FLASHBACK with me to the church service, where I'm sitting next to Tina in the nosebleed section. It was Tina's 2nd visit. She's a real estate agent, seems so nice. I'll probably never see her again. This could be Lesson 3....

3. I'm not great at remembering names. I don't think anyone really is.

The whole secret to remembering them is attaching them to something you already know, and can remember. When Tina introduced herself to me I immediately thought "Oh, Tina Fey...Tina from Napoleon Dynamite". When Andre, the guy in front of my introduced himself to me, I thought "Hey, my friend Marcie's husband is Andre." I can't for the life of me remember the new Andre's wife's name because I didn't think anything when I met her. I didn't attach it to anything. I need to work on that.

All this reminds me of a lecture my favorite professor, Dr. Janas, gave my freshmen year. The man is such a genius, a lot of what he'd ramble went over my head as a freshmen, but I caught this. It's all backed by some Communication Theory I couldn't tell you the name of (and I'm deeply sorry to Drs. Parker and Janas if you're reading this), but he said our minds are like building blocks. We're born as a clean slate and we don't know anything. Then, as we learn, we attach the things we learn to our past experiences. That's why we don't remember much from the first 3 years of our lives. We're establishing the experiences that we'll attach our memories to. To remember something, you have to have something to connect it to. The things we don't mentally attach to anything are forgotten. Its confusing without examples. But it works with remembering names. I'll remember Tina and Andre because I attached their names to other things I already know.


I didn't realize I would need 30 extra minutes to park and find a seat, so I was really late getting to the actual service. Before the preacher got up, they showed a video on clips of war, destruction, famine, earthquakes, terrorist attacks and whatnot. I could tell this was going to be one of those uplifting feel-good sermons....
The preacher led in saying he was preaching on Mark 13- Jesus talking about the Apocalypse. Honestly, that's not really the first sermon I want to hear when I'm visiting a church. People get weird about the Apocalypse, and I started looking around for the Kool-Aid they were going to make me drink.  He didn't take the weird route. You know the one...when people start telling you Jesus is coming back next weekend because there was an earthquake in Australia last night and the Anti-Christ is the President. He made it clear that he was not there to give dates or details of when it was coming, but to prepare us for the fact that is WAS coming. This was a good reminder. I think a lot of preachers avoid Apocalyptic preaching because, honestly, no one wants to scare their congregation talking about the Tribulation. The sermon did remind me of my 4th and most important life lesson.

4. This is all temporary
My job might be temporary. My search for friends is temporary. The troubles we face in this world are temporary. And ultimately, this world is temporary. He talked briefly about not putting your faith in America because just like the capital of Haiti turned into rubble, Washington D.C. one day will be flattened (whether or not its in our lifetime, it will happen). The temple in Jerusalem will be flattened (because Jesus said so in Mark 13). He said a lot of things, but one thing stuck with me: "Guns don't kill people. People kill people. Earthquakes don't kill people. The buildings people build kill people....Wars don't make peace. We will always have war, but we won't have peace until the Prince of Peace returns."
Bottom line: More people are being persecuted for their faith today than in the past 2,000 years combined (someone should do a fact check on that). Even though we can worship freely without persecution in the US, there will come a day when that freedom is taken away. Will I remain faithful in times of persecution? What am I doing in this time of peace to help me stand in a time of persecution? He said when they take our Bibles away, I'll wish I had memorized more scripture. Now, there is no guarantee this persecution will come in my lifetime, but I would be ignorant to assume it won't. It IS guaranteed that in the end times, Christians everywhere will be persecuted. Christians all over the country are comfortable, and it was refreshing to hear someone tell me this comfortable place where Christians sit in society is temporary and its being threatened.
He said to the church, "I hope we are the first church they come to shut down, and we're the last ones who will shut up."
How's that for a warm-fuzzy feel-good sermon? The kind of preachers I like are the ones who preach longer than 15 minutes and actually step on people's toes. They actually say something worth listening to. They challenge you. Offending your congregation with Biblical truth will strangely keep them coming back. If you spoon-feed them what they want to hear (the prosperity Gospel and any other self-gratifying version of the Gospel) they won't be fulfilled and they'll leave. At least that's my take on it.